For Valentine’s Day my husband made me a card. In the card, he listed all the things that I do. Some items on his list include: therapist, confidant, Skyper, parental caretaker, limo driver, financial advisor, bookkeeper, reminder service, back scratcher, morning hugger, temper calmer, exerciser, writer, and blogger.
His list was quite extensive, and he made it positive and fun. The card and the list gave me a chance to reflect on what I do for others. I never thought about some of the smaller things that he listed. Items like morning hugger or cuddler are automatics or routine that I just do. However, he took notice. And while some items on the list were things I did for me, others were based on demand or just some of my quirks. One of those quirks is being a restaurant selector. Mike will suggest a restaurant that he wants to go to and I’ll select a different one. We usually go to the one that I select. Yes, I’m bad but we both realize it’s how I roll. We laugh at my quirk.
I then thought this would be good exercise for others, like you, to do. In a given timeframe, whether a one-month or six-month period, write down what you do for yourself and for others. Write accomplishments, quirks, daily routines from work and home, and those unexpected events or tasks that you do. By making a list, you’ll have a visual of what you actually do (small or large) which can be a nice eye opener.
Once you have your list, ask your partner or a friend to write the same type of list about you so you can see what they see or think about you. Compare lists. You may be surprised at what your partner or friend has written down. Next, do the same exercise for them. It’s a good way to learn about him or her, share smiles, and to appreciate each other even more.